"Always in a Mood" (April 23, 2015)

Hey Guys,

I know it’s been in awhile since I posted something, so here you. Here’s some drama for ya.

So I’ve been going through a lot of stuff for the past 3 weeks and I didn’t want to talk to anyone, but 3 people.  Sorry you weren’t one of them.  Not really, but anyways.  Just because I don’t want to talk to you, and everything you say is annoying the shit out of me, doesn’t mean I’m always in a mood.  Out of the 3 of us you are the #1 Drama queen.  Always throwing “My Anxiety” this “My Depression” that.  We all know you have it, but now; actually I’ve been thinking it’s a cry for attention.  Why didn’t he just let us stop being friends? You think I’m a bitch, well I think you’re a bitch.

I’m allowed to be sad. Not everything has to be about you.  Everything doesn’t have to be about me either, but every fucking conversation is about you and him, or how you hate your job, or how your anxiety is over the top and you want to kill yourself.  But when I feel like I made a mistake or I have a bad day and that bad day turns into a bad week, I’m “Always in a mood”.  Maybe instead of bitching about me behind my back, ask me what’s wrong. Ever thought of that? Of course you haven’t because all you wanna talk about is yourself.

Yes, I’m in a “Mood” now because you also think I’m in a mood as much as I do for you.  This is why I don’t have many friends, because of shit like this. If I’m having a bad day or whatever, I don’t need a friend to talk behind my back saying “Oh Shit she’s in a mood again. Like always”. I put my shit aside all the time to deal with your shit when I don’t really have too.  And to be honest I don’t even wanna hangout Saturday.  I don’t want to spend the night and I don’t even wanna see your face.

To be honest I’m thinking of just staying home for the summer. Just work and family. Save money for my own car, try to get out of this house, move into an apartment.  The possibility that I have planned for myself are endless and I’m gonna start this weekend.  I’m gonna focus on myself, I’m going to get fit, I’m gonna be happy, I’m gonna have fun and I’m gonna be a young adult I should and not a little kid.  I’m not gonna let anyone hold me back anymore. I’m not gonna second guess myself.  I’m gonna do me.

Thanks for reading

See Ya Later

Emmie <3